Advent Activity Links

We are about a week into Advent, so I wanted to provide a few ideas for parents to share this season with their children. The Advent wreath is a great way for families to celebrate. See this link (U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops) for prayers, devotions, and blessings for Advent wreaths, Christmas Trees, Nativity Scenes and reading for candle lighting   http://www.usccb.org/prayer-and-worship/liturgical-year/advent/index.cfm?utm_source=advent&utm_medium=shorturl&utm_campaign=advent/
The site titled Peanut Butter and Grace has a plethora of simple to complex ideas for Advent activities, including a Jesse Tree, book recommendations and frequent articles that cover special feast days. You can find it at http://www.pbgrace.com/
http://catholicmom.com/  has printables, crafts, and more.
Your younger kids may enjoy Holy Heroes, a site that includes Advent Adventure with daily activities including things parents can print and online videos and quizzes. Use this link http://www.holyheroes.com/
This is not a full list of everything that is out there, but these are some of my favorite sites. You may even find a new tradition for your family.
Have a great Advent Season, and enter into Christmas with open hearts!

Giving Thanks

My children really like Thanksgiving. I think they most like the feast. I can't blame them for that. The feast is a treat and taking the day off to spend together with family is a blessing.
Thanksgiving is also a great opportunity to consider our attitude in life. We often take for granted the myriad blessings we have. We have a warm home to shelter us from the elements, enough food to eat, clothes that are appropriate for the weather, and beyond that many things which are simply fun.
I was looking at the azure sky, the blue reflecting on the river, the trees in their Autumn foliage, etc. a couple of days ago. I realized how the food we eat and the materials needed to provide us shelter, transportation, and much more are all there for us in nature. I think one of the most perfect things that exists is the apple. They grow in abundance on trees, and are ready to eat the moment we pluck them from the branch. The experience of picking apples touches all of our senses; the feel of the firm fruit, the fragrance of the tree and the ripe apples, the color of the leaves and fruit, the flavor of the apple and snap of the skin as we bite into it. There are so many wondrous and beautiful things we take for granted.
As we think about the abundance of nature and the enjoyment we receive from it, we can have grateful hearts. As we serve our family with the chores we do, we can be thankful that we have family to serve. As we bear with that difficult person in our life, we can be glad that we probably aren't dealing with the difficulties that have made them that way.
I plan to take a few moments with my children to remind them of this. I hope that the lesson of how gratitude can make life happier will spill over into the rest of the year.

Perspective

A young friend of mine is very into the whole vegan/save the animals thing. I don't mind that people are into that. I do mind being insulted because my choices are different than theirs. I do mind being constantly inundated with social media messages that suggest I am a murderer because I use milk, butter, cheese, eggs, fish, poultry and meat. I do mind the suggestion that only vegans are intelligent enough to figure out how a human should eat. I mind that they go even further to suggest that our government aught to legislate in such a way as to make the above mentioned foods unavailable. It is hubris to think that everyone else should change to agree with you.
The arguments made by the people this young person idolizes range from containing some truth to being completely ridiculous. So, I just want to follow the idea that no one should use animal products of any kind to its logical conclusion. First, I could not use any form of petroleum distillate because that is made from fossilized animals. Lets eliminate all plastics, gas, oil, coal, asphalt and tar from use to support our cause. That means no plastic bottles, or containers, or furniture with plastic parts, or synthetic fabrics or fibers, no paint on the walls, no driving cars or using asphalt roads, and a gas, oil, or coal furnace is out of the question; we would would have to purchase only wind, solar, or hydroelectric power; but wait, we can't use plastics so insulated wiring is out, too. We need to eliminate glass because it is made of the melted remains of tiny sea creatures. Since we wouldn't be able to buy anything with plastic or glass packaging or use those asphalt roads, that means we had better hope we can barter for or grow everything we need where we live. We can't leave the block and it would be unethical to ask anyone to use those roads for us. Maybe, though, the whole argument is moot, because we couldn't use social media; we couldn't use computers or phones because they are made with plastic and are powered by charging them with insulated wires.
It is a wonderful thing to be young and passionate, but it is not wonderful for young people to be disrespectful and rude to anyone who has a different way of seeing things. It is not wonderful to try to force your opinion upon everyone else. Young people often lack perspective, but they also lack the self-discipline to behave courteously to those with different opinions. You don't win people over by insulting them. You show respect, and act respectably to earn the right to discuss your views politely.

Why Teaching Our Children Faith Is Important

The world we live in is full of problems. Most of them are things we have little power to change. There is one particular area where the things we do as parents today can make a huge difference in the future. The Church is not immune to the attitudes and values of our society. In fact, I would not be entirely wrong if I said that a breakdown in values within the Church has led to the state our society is in today. When social justice took a front stage in the Church, many people felt that things were headed in the right direction as Christians worked towards fairness and accountability in society. I am not saying that we do not have a responsibility in that area, but something very important was lost in the process. What was lost was an emphasis on Jesus, on a relationship with Him as the foundation on which we can build a better society. Teaching became more focused on social responsibility than relationship with the Lord Jesus. Two generations have grown up not learning the most important tenets of the faith. We cannot allow another generation to pass before we change what we do. The current generation can be the one who swings the pendulum back. They will not be that generation unless we, their parents, teach them faithfully. They need us to pray with them and for them. They need us to learn and teach them the scriptures. They need us to instruct them on why we do the things we do. Social responsibility needs to be anchored in a vibrant faith which has Jesus Christ at its center. The current generation of young people want badly to do something significant. We have to show them their value; we have to show them the power of a life lived by faith, the power of grace to transform people. The only way this is going to happen is for parents to take the lead. We must learn what we missed learning and share it with our children. We cannot depend upon catechism classes or weekly mass to teach them. We have to do that within our homes, the domestic church. While many parishes are beginning to offer adult catechism and Bible Study classes to cradle Catholics, there remains a burden on us to complete our knowledge of the faith. We cannot afford to leave education in our faith to others. The time has come for us to live as responsible Christians, faithful Christians. Prayer needs to be an unmistakable part of our family lives. We need to tell our children the stories of the Bible and the stories of the saints. Most of all, we must set an example by the way in which we live and the priorities we set. The generation we are raising can change things, but they won't unless we show them how.

Things Every Child Should Be Told

As a parent, and particularly as a Christian parent, I want my children to know how amazing they are and are meant to be.  Most of all, I want them to be secure in knowing that they can never do anything to cause God or their parents to stop loving them.
When I was a young person, I struggled with self-esteem and with what I perceived to be the view of other Christians towards me. Those self-doubts lingered into my thirties, when I struggled with the reasons I was suffering chronic pain. The main reason that I felt less than accepted by others has to do not only with their words and actions, but more than that, with my misconceptions about God.
I was taught that God "saved" me when I invited Jesus to be my Lord. The problem was, I kept struggling to do the right things. Unfortunately, the same theology that taught "once saved, always saved", and "saved by faith alone" left me doubtful of my salvation when I struggled with sin in my life. I didn't know how to restore my relationship with God apart from a "rededication" of my life, and walking down the aisle over and over again seemed like a hollow gesture. I even knew people who were "rebaptized".
The good news for me came when I realized that is not how we were meant to do this thing called the Christian Life. Jesus knew, having been human himself, that we would struggle with sin as long as we lived on Earth. He built restoration into the way that the Church operates. After the resurrection, He started with Peter. Not only did He forgive Peter for denying Him, He fully restored Peter to the position He had given him as Head of the Church. (John 21:15-19). Jesus wants us to be fully restored and for us to move forward with the things we are called to without looking back. My children need to know that their past will not be held over them, that they can always do today well even if they failed miserably yesterday.

Children need to know that we believe in them. They need to know that they were made good, and that they can choose to do good even when it is difficult. They need to know we will be there to help them when the right choice is the hard choice. They need to know how proud we are when they make the right choices, and that a mistake will never negate that.


The Church offers grace to us and to our children through the sacraments. It is important to take them to Mass each Sunday and day of holy obligation. It is important for them to receive Communion. It is important to take them to church for Confession regularly so that they can keep their consciences clean. It is important to pray with them and pray for them. We must talk to them and pray for the things that concern them because that is how they learn to look to God for grace when they are struggling. We must speak about the scriptures and help them apply the teachings of Jesus to their daily lives.
The wisdom of the scriptures can be of great benefit to our children.
The most important things we give our children are not material; they are spiritual truths that will help them when they struggle. Those spiritual truths will help them to be their best selves; help them embrace the people they are meant to be. Those spiritual truths will help them find restoration and inner peace when they make mistakes. Those spiritual truths will inform them of their true value when others put them down or denigrate their efforts.
I want my children, and all children for that matter, to grow up to know how very valued, loved and unique they are. I want them to be able to shine as the amazing creatures they have always been and always will be.

No Signs of Weakness

As a parent and teacher, I find discipline to be one of the most difficult things I have to do.  It is not just that I have to be the "bad guy".  I can (mostly) handle that without becoming emotional.  For me, it is the struggle with a chronic pain condition.
My kids seem to zone right in on the fact that I am not up to the rigors of discipline when I am having a bad day.  They become more difficult to find and lose their sense of hearing suddenly. 
In order to cut down on this craziness, I have learned that it is necessary to show no signs of weakness. Those days when I am in pain and would rather not get out of bed are the days I must get up early. I need the extra time to prepare myself for the day.  I pray a little extra, I stretch and walk to work the aches out, and I create a game plan while I drink that first cup of coffee. If I am up before the kids and wake them in a sickeningly chipper way, they think I am having a good day. Chalk one up to mom.
If I can keep the limp to a minimum and keep focused when I want to cry out in pain, we just might make it through the day with no one, including myself, being grounded!

The Role of Music in Learning

One aspect of being a home schooling mom is that I am free to include aspects of teaching that don't always translate well in classrooms with a high student to teacher ratio. I am also free to include subjects that have been eliminated by many public schools as "non-essential".
One thing that makes our day go better is the use of music in our classroom.  From playing classical music during handwriting warm-ups to playing instrumental music as background noise to help kids focus while I bounce between students helping them with work, music is a big part of our day. Music also helps with memorization and learning the mechanics of music helps young minds develop in important ways. We do "jingles" to remember rules in English, Phonetics, and Spelling. We make up songs to help us remember the order of historical facts. We sing prayers. We sing silly songs to give us a respite from intense mental work.
There is a music course as part of our curriculum, and my children sing and play musical instruments. They share their talents in a variety of ways outside of our home.
Even if you are not a musician yourself, you can incorporate music into your child's life in many ways. Look for learning song CDs and MP3s. There are a plethora of learning song videos on YouTube. These can be very beneficial for your young scholars. My kids love Schoolhouse Rock. Many of those are on YouTube for your viewing pleasure. Music just helps us connect to things in a different way than any other mode of learning.
I am not saying to substitute music for visual, aural, or hands-on learning. I am saying that children can get more out of these modes of learning when music is included. An important way we learn to read is by repetition. We do most of our reading by memorizing words, which we then easily recognize every time we see them. Allowing children to get some of that repetition by singing along to a catchy tune is fun for them.
Another wonderful benefit of including music in our days is movement. Children naturally want to dance along with a catchy riff.  Let them stand as they listen and watch learning songs, and encourage them to dance along or make up motions for the song. Kids retain information better when they associate music and motion with it.( They are also getting exercise while they do this.) Have fun with your child. You never know, you may have a budding Mozart in your midst!

Lent for the Teaching Parent

Lent is probably my favorite season of the Church year. At this point my readers are saying ,"why? What's so great about fasting, penance, and almsgiving?"
My experiences during Lent have been so positive in recent years that I look forward to it every year. It was during Lent that I went to confession for the first time and was completely reconciled with Jesus and The Church. It had a profound impact on me. Every year during Lent, I make a special effort to increase my prayer time and read scriptures daily. I usually also read a spiritual book such as "Life of Christ" by Fulton Sheen, or "Imitation of Christ" by Thomas A Kempis, or "Story of a Soul" by St. Therese of Liseux. These things always cause me to look at my life critically and I grow spiritually during every Lenten cycle.
Another great benefit of Lent is that I have many great opportunities to share the faith with my children. We go to confession as a family more often. I share the stories of the saints, read scripture with them, and our family is more deliberate about family devotional time daily. I take every opportunity to teach my children how to be charitable within our family. We find ways to show Christ to those we encounter outside of our home, especially praying for those who are difficult.
As our family seeks out ways to share with others and to be good to each other, we all grow spiritually and it strengthens our bond with each other and with the Church.
I pray that even if Lent does not become your favorite part of the Church year, that it will become a time you truly love as you grow in virtue.

Parents as Primary Teachers

If you are a parent, then you are a teacher. Children learn most of the things that really stick with them from their parents. Some parents teach accidentally, others teach deliberately; most fall somewhere between the two. We always hope that the things our children learn from us are positive.
There is no more important realm in which we teach our children than in the area of their spiritual lives. The spiritual health and maturity of our children has far-reaching effects in their lives. Spiritual training gives them a moral basis upon which to make decisions. It gives them hope when things are difficult. It also helps them to remember that they are exactly who they were made to be in a world of people who are often confused about who they are. Religious teaching gives them a healthy outlook on life.
If you are a Catholic parent, you are your child's primary catechist. If you have been doing this accidentally, it may be time to consider being more deliberate about it. Children need you to deliberately speak to them about spiritual matters. It is especially important when they are preparing for Sacraments.
Do you have a lot to learn about the faith in order to do this effectively? Take heart! The Apostles were first Disciples (from the Latin "discipuli", meaning "students"). One of the things that encourages me is knowing that I am called to be a student of Christ every bit as much as I am called to teach. In fact, the best teachers always remain students.
To get started, make sure you have the basic tools available to you. A copy of the Bible and a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) should be your primary resources. These are available in digital form, but if you prefer paper order them or ask for a copy from your parish priest or religious education coordinator. Don't forget that the pastor and deacons of your parish are there to help you in your spiritual journey. Ask questions often. Solicit their assistance in approaching scripture and catechetical study.
It is always good to know what your child is learning about in catechism class. What things are being focused on during this year? You can then focus on the things you want to reinforce for your children. Our parish uses a curriculum that features take home pages for the parents. Going over these with your children will not go amiss.
The most important thing you can do, however, is to live your faith openly. Be faithful in your prayer life. Let your children see that you make it a priority. Pray with your children. Say grace at meals, start the day with a morning offering, send them to school with a simple blessing, pray with them before bed. Pepper your conversations with spiritual truth.  Designate time for reading scripture or Bible stories. Pray the Rosary as a family on a regular basis. Go to confession as a family at least once a month. Embark upon a scripture study course or read a good spiritual book (the saints have provided us with a number of great ones). I personally highly recommend "Life of Christ" by Fulton Sheen. It is a great way to become a student of Christ.
You are your child's primary teacher whether you do so intentionally or accidentally. I hope that you are encouraged to be a more intentional teacher.